A lesson in oral sex - how to go down on her!
Does anyone still use the word cunnilingus? And, what is it anyway?
In plain language it is the act of oral sex, going down on a woman, licking out, even eating out!! It is being able to sexually pleasure a woman using the tongue and mouth or even other parts of the face.
How to give her the best!!
Performing oral sex on women can sometimes be seen as a bit of a mystery, however, learning the right techniques could have endless pleasurable results and make you a champion in the bedroom. You can never not improve your oral skills. Yes, all women have different preferences, but there are some common principles that will make the majority very happy indeed:
Our three principles of great oral sex on a woman.
1. Listen to her (the most important one!)
Make sure you know and work out what she wants, and that she feels comfortable telling you about it. Also, pay attention to how she reacts to what you’re doing. Work within her boundaries and get some direction from her about what she likes. This is her at her most intimate. She is at her most vulnerable during oral sex and is giving herself to you. Make her feel that she’s special to you and you want to please her more than you want to please yourself.
2. Don’t treat it like a chore
No man wants to feel like a woman isn’t enjoying giving a blow job and it’s the same for women. If we feel like you’re not having fun, we’re unlikely to have much fun ourselves. Play some romantic music in the background to get you both relaxed and in the zone! Get your whole face in there, give her a facial, use your nose. Moan and make some noise, let her know that you love the taste of her. Tell her that she smells delicious. Make her feel appreciated and adored…. She will love you for this and it will help her to relax into the experience!
3. Mix it up!
There are so many ways to pleasure a woman with oral sex, and even if you’ve been getting great reviews for years, there’s probably more you can try. Missionary is not the only position for giving a woman head. Ask her to sit on your face while you lie on your back -- this allows her to control the bumping and grinding and you can rest assured she's finding a rhythm that works.
How to get started...
· Make sure she’s in the mood
First things first, if she doesn’t feel relaxed or feels like you don’t really want to do this, she’s not going to enjoy it. Obvious things, such as starting with some kissing, will help but also make sure she’s comfortable with the idea of oral sex. While you’re kissing, test the waters by seeing which parts of her body respond to your touch, it could be her thigh, her neck, her stomach, nipples and so on. You can then incorporate these areas later.
· Work your way up to going down
There are plenty of places you can cover in order to build up the tension before moving towards her erogenous zones. Kissing, licking and gently biting her legs from the ankle up can feel incredible. Start on the inner ankle, inner calf, behind the knee then work your way up the thighs…
· Don’t head straight for the clit!!
Once you arrive between her legs, there’s much more to do than simply lick the clitoris. If she’s turned on, every touch (and breath!) in this area has the power to make her gasp… Less can be way more. You could try stimulating her through the hood, rather than diving straight onto the clitoris itself.
· Read her reactions
From heavy breathing and gentle moans to the ego-boosting ‘OMG… HOW are you doing that??’, use her reactions to decide what to keep doing and when to change things up. The longer you take to build things up, the more rewarding her orgasm is likely to be, so pay attention! In fact, because the act itself allows her the opportunity to “let go,” women tend to achieve orgasm more readily and more intensely than with penetration. Eye contact is a personal thing – much like a lot of this stuff, everyone has a preference. Watching her reactions can obviously be useful, but gauge whether she wants you to look into her eyes while you go down on her. There’s a fine line between intensely sexy… and a little bit creepy.
· Use your tongue and mouth and maybe more….
Did you know that your tongue contains eight muscles – and these help to shape it in many different ways and adapt the pressure you can use. For example, flattening your tongue to lick slowly all the way up the vulva, then pointing it to slide inside her vagina or flick quickly over the clitoris… there’s plenty you can do here.
Whilst we’re talking about your mouth, let us not forget your lips and your breath. Your lips can be used to suck her clit, or simply hold it between your lips and hum. Gentle breath kisses bring tingles and circulation to the surface of her skin to build anticipation and arousal. Gently exhaling your warm breath on her just before you actually touch can feel incredible, just as blowing a little cool air on her after you’ve licked her, or used some stimulating lube, can make her squeal with ecstasy.
· Use your hands
Your hands can play a really important part in oral sex, whether that’s gently opening her labia to give you better access to the clitoris or sliding them (wet please! Saliva or lube are our friends) into her vagina – start with one and add more if she wants. Curling your fingers towards the front of her body means you can stimulate her G-spot too.
Clit vibrators and stimulators, G spot vibrators and butt plugs can add an extra dimension to the experience. Extra vibrations or pressure that you don’t have quite enough fingers to create can take her from ‘yes, this is good,’ to the neighbours asking if everything is okay.
· Use lube!
Yes, you can use the saliva in your mouth – and that’s great – but does this make her clit tingle, warm up, or taste like prosecco? Mmmm, I don’t think so. Have a look at our range of flavoured lubes – they’re a real game-changer and seriously taste delicious. One of our top favourites in the Caramel Apple flavour, but we have a wide range for all tastes. Yum!!
· Make her orgasm
Many women have a blended orgasm, meaning she receives more than one kind of stimulation at the same time. So, to give you the best chance of making her come from oral sex, cover as many bases as you can. Most orgasms involve the clitoris in one way or another, so licking the clit is a good start. Adding the G-spot into the mix, using your finger/s or a vibrator, might just help tip the balance. The same can be said for stroking the nipples if the position allows.
· When you know she’s getting ready to orgasm, keep going.
Changing things at this point might mean she loses her rhythm, which can be pretty frustrating and land you both back to square one. If you’re comfortable enough and happy with what you’re doing (obviously) then just keep going. The most common complaint about cunnilingus is that it’s not offered enough or for long enough She’ll thank you. A lot.
The team at Privé Play